{"id":4768,"date":"2025-08-11T18:43:25","date_gmt":"2025-08-11T16:43:25","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/duhovyrok.sk\/qys\/?p=4768"},"modified":"2025-08-11T18:43:44","modified_gmt":"2025-08-11T16:43:44","slug":"pamatam-sa-na-neistotu-ale-aj-tuzbu-po-slobode","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/duhovyrok.sk\/qys\/pamatam-sa-na-neistotu-ale-aj-tuzbu-po-slobode\/","title":{"rendered":"Pam\u00e4t\u00e1m sa na neistotu, ale aj t\u00fa\u017ebu po slobode"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Autor: Andrej Kuruc \/ Foto:<\/strong> <strong>Arch\u00edv Andreja Kuruca<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>Text sme prv\u00fd raz publikovali v \u010d\u00edsle Jar 2025.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ke\u010f sa obzer\u00e1m sp\u00e4\u0165 na svoje mlad\u00e9 roky v\u202f90. rokoch, vybavuje sa mi ten zvl\u00e1\u0161tny pocit neistoty, ale aj t\u00fa\u017eby patri\u0165 niekam, kde by som mohol d\u00fdcha\u0165 slobodnej\u0161ie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Prv\u00fd krok bol nesmel\u00fd \u2013 zavola\u0165 na linku d\u00f4very zdru\u017eenia HABIO, ktor\u00e9 vyd\u00e1valo aj \u010dasopis <em>Gajdy<\/em>. Dlho som v\u202fsebe zberal odvahu, ale ten telefon\u00e1t mi otvoril dvere a&nbsp;za nimi som na\u0161iel \u013eud\u00ed, ktor\u00ed mi za\u010dali d\u00e1va\u0165 pocit, \u017ee v tom nie som s\u00e1m.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Prv\u00e9 stretnutie \u2013 pri morovom st\u013ape. Nepoznali sme sa, a\u202fpredsa tam bolo nie\u010do, \u010do n\u00e1s sp\u00e1jalo. Poh\u013eady, \u00fasmevy, opatrn\u00e9 ot\u00e1zky a\u202fodpovede. Bol to m\u00f4j takmer prv\u00fd kontakt s\u202fviacer\u00fdmi kv\u00edr \u013eu\u010fmi naraz a\u202fpam\u00e4t\u00e1m si, ak\u00e9 zvl\u00e1\u0161tne aj kr\u00e1sne bolo zrazu hovori\u0165 nahlas o\u202fveciach, ktor\u00e9 som predt\u00fdm nosil len vo vn\u00fatri.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Stret\u00e1vali sme sa na r\u00f4znych miestach \u2013 v kr\u010dm\u00e1ch, na bytoch, ale aj v\u202fGr\u00e9miu, ktor\u00e9 sa stalo jedn\u00fdm z\u202fna\u0161ich spolo\u010dn\u00fdch priestorov. V\u202ft\u00fdch rozhovoroch bol kus odvahy, ale aj ve\u013ea smiechu, \u013eudskosti, porozumenia. Hovorili sme o\u202fvz\u0165ahoch, o tom, ako sa \u017eije s\u202ft\u00fdm, k\u00fdm sme, v krajine, ktor\u00e1 na to nebola pripraven\u00e1. Rie\u0161il sa filmov\u00fd festival, nov\u00e9 filmy, ktor\u00e9 n\u00e1m ukazovali, \u017ee aj inde \u013eudia bojuj\u00fa a\u202fmiluj\u00fa.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ob\u010das sme vyrazili aj na turistiku \u2013 trochu si odd\u00fdchnu\u0165 od mesta, rozpr\u00e1va\u0165 sa pri ch\u00f4dzi, kde slov\u00e1 plynuli \u013eah\u0161ie. Pr\u00e1ve v\u202ft\u00fdchto kruhoch som spoznal aj svoj prv\u00fd hlb\u0161\u00ed vz\u0165ah. Bolo to nie\u010do, \u010do ma zasiahlo a\u017e do kost\u00ed \u2013 jemn\u00e9, krehk\u00e9, ale skuto\u010dn\u00e9. Mo\u017eno pr\u00e1ve preto, \u017ee to bolo v\u202fprostred\u00ed, kde sme si mohli dovoli\u0165 by\u0165 pravdiv\u00ed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Tieto stretnutia, tieto tv\u00e1re, tie rozhovory \u2013 boli pre m\u0148a nie\u010d\u00edm, \u010do si nesiem so sebou dodnes. Boli moj\u00edm prv\u00fdm naozajstn\u00fdm dotykom s\u202fkomunitou, ktor\u00e1 mi pomohla uveri\u0165, \u017ee aj pre m\u0148a je miesto na svete.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-full\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"526\" height=\"441\" src=\"https:\/\/duhovyrok.sk\/qys\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/2\/2025\/05\/Kniha-Strateni.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-4827\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>\u00daryvok z knihy Andreja Kuruca <em>Straten\u00ed v&nbsp;nahr\u00e1vkach<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Zhlboka d\u00fdchal, nezn\u00e1\u0161al rozhovory s opatrovate\u013ekou, ako s v\u00e4\u010d\u0161inou dospe\u00adl\u00fdch, zra\u0148ovali ho. Obzrel sa, Magda zmizla. Tras\u00facimi sa prstami vy\u0165ukal \u010d\u00edslo, ktor\u00e9 mal perom na\u010dm\u00e1ran\u00e9 na z\u00e1p\u00e4st\u00ed. Zvon\u00ed raz\u2026 Dva\u2026 Tri\u2026 Johan sa \u0161m\u00fdka po stene. \u0160tyri&#8230; P\u00e4\u0165\u2026 \u0160es\u0165\u2026 Bezn\u00e1dejn\u00fd seri\u00e1l. Osem\u2026 Dev\u00e4\u0165\u2026 Dopadne na kamenn\u00fa dl\u00e1\u017eku. Desa\u0165\u2026 Niekto to zdvihol.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eHal\u00f3.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eHal\u00f3\u2026 tam je\u2026\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201e\u00c1no.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eJa som Ivo. Ako ti m\u00f4\u017eem pom\u00f4c\u0165?\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ticho. Ivo vedel, \u017ee chv\u00ed\u013eku trv\u00e1, k\u00fdm volaj\u00faci na druhej strane naberie odva\u00adhu a nie\u010do vykokce, alebo k\u00fdm zlo\u017e\u00ed, preto zvykol v\u00e4\u010d\u0161inou po\u010d\u00edta\u0165 do dvadsa\u0165.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eJa som asi\u2026 Ja m\u00e1m r\u00e1d\u2026\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201e\u010cur\u00e1ky? Prep\u00e1\u010d, intern\u00fd humor, p\u00e1\u010dia sa ti mu\u017ei.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201e\u00c1no.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eJe to \u00faplne v poriadku.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eChcel by som niekoho spozna\u0165.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eM\u00f4\u017eeme sa stretn\u00fa\u0165. Pravidelne sa stret\u00e1vame. V stredu o siedmej.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eM\u00f4\u017eem pr\u00eds\u0165?\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201e\u00c1no. Pri morovom st\u013ape. Tam \u0165a vyzdvihnem. Porozpr\u00e1val by som sa viac, ale u\u017e mus\u00edm kon\u010di\u0165. Tak pr\u00ed\u010f.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201ePr\u00eddem.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">V telef\u00f3ne \u0161\u0165uklo a kliklo aj v Johanovi, akoby sa z neho vysypala tona minc\u00ed. V hracom automate nasko\u010dili tri rovnak\u00e9 obr\u00e1zky jednoro\u017ecov.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Aj ja sa to\u010d\u00edm v kruhu, uva\u017eoval na Idylke zni\u010den\u00fd Johan, bezmocnos\u0165 ho provokovala kovov\u00fdmi paz\u00farmi, ktor\u00e9 nosili \u017eeny pred storo\u010diami na rukaviciach, aby sa ubr\u00e1nili n\u00e1siln\u00edkom.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Tak\u00e9 by sa mu hodili aj pri barokovom Morovom st\u013ape z roku 1713 na Rybnom n\u00e1mest\u00ed, kde sa v dan\u00fa stredu o\u0161\u00edval. Postavili ho na pamiatku \u013eud\u00ed, ktor\u00ed pod\u013eahli z\u00e1kernej epid\u00e9mii. Nie\u010do podobn\u00e9 sa dialo gejom koncom 80. rokov 20. storo\u010dia s epid\u00e9miou HIV, mreli na desa\u0165tis\u00edce ako \u010dervoto\u010de, ale tak\u00e9 pietne miesto toto mesto nevybudovalo. \u010cu\u010dal na monument\u00e1lny hrad na kopci a vn\u00edmal ruch zo \u0161tvorpr\u00fadovky. Tu mal \u010daka\u0165. A nadv\u00e4zova\u0165 kontakt s okolostojacimi t\u00fdpkami. Ob\u010fale\u010d post\u00e1val \u0161vih\u00e1k v ko\u017eenej bunde, \u017emurkol na Johana, vybral z kapsy bal\u00edk Wrigley&#8217;s a hodil si do bezodn\u00fdch \u00fast jednu \u017euva\u010dku. \u017deby sa pl\u00e1noval bozk\u00e1va\u0165? Johan si v svojej premieta\u010dke automaticky pustil romantick\u00fd film, v ktorom k nemu kr\u00e1savec pristupuje, schmatne ho za driek a vtisne mu jazyk a\u017e po mandle. \u017dia\u013e, namiesto Johana zovrel ko\u017ee\u0148\u00e1k v n\u00e1ru\u010d\u00ed bujar\u00fa diev\u010dinu s ve\u013ekou oringlou v uchu. Proti gustu \u017eiaden di\u0161put\u00e1t, pomyslel si Johan a utrel si nadr\u017ean\u00fa slinku z brady. To u\u017e sa k nemu pribli\u017eoval chlap\u00edk s kapuc\u0148ou na hlave. \u017deby to bol on? Zaka\u017ed\u00fdm spravil krok a potom zvl\u00e1\u0161tne gesto v \u0161t\u00fdle kung-fu, a\u017e zastal pred n\u00edm. Johan sa u\u017e na\u010dahoval, \u017ee ho pozdrav\u00ed, no mu\u017e zachr\u010dal.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eDovol\u00ed\u0161?\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Johan sa uhol, nezn\u00e1my kopol do st\u013apika a spravil do luftu gesto \u00e0 la me\u00addituj\u00faci budhistick\u00fd mn\u00edch. Potom si napravil jednu nohavicu, mal ju vyhr\u00adnut\u00fa. Schizoidn\u00e1 porucha, vyhodnotil Johan, hoci ju e\u0161te nepreberali. Ninja pokra\u010doval \u010falej.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Vtedy si Johan v\u0161imol, \u017ee na neho uprene \u010dum\u00ed star\u0161\u00ed p\u00e1n so strieborn\u00fdmi vlasmi. Pripom\u00ednal mu otca, ktor\u00e9ho sa sna\u017eil naveky zapudi\u0165. Nu\u017e pre\u010do by aj seniori nemohli by\u0165 homo, dumal a usmial sa na neho. P\u00e1n v okamihu zvra\u0161til \u010delo, asi n\u00e1hla kolika, s\u00fadil Johan. P\u00e1n zasipel.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201ePederast,\u201c vydral zo seba a odp\u013eul si. Jeho kobrie \u0161pic\u00e1ky vstrekli do Johanov\u00fdch v\u00e9n neurotox\u00edn. Zmeravel, rozklepal sa. Spoza rohu sa k p\u00e1novi pripojila starenka s vn\u00fa\u010datami, vrelo ich obj\u00edmal. Zrazu Johanovi niekto za\u0165ukal po \u0161iji. Pomaly sa ot\u00e1\u010dal, a\u017e sa pristavil pri rozjasnenej viz\u00e1\u017ei.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eTy si Johan?\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Prik\u00fdvol.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eJa som Rado.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eNemal pr\u00eds\u0165 Ivo?\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eNest\u00edhal, h\u00e1dam ti neprek\u00e1\u017eam,\u201c dodal urazene.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eNie, nie,\u201c nerv\u00f3zne kr\u00fatil krkom Johan. \u201eAko si vedel?\u201c hanbil sa.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eM\u00e1\u0161 tak\u00e9 na\u0161sk\u00e9 rysy a ri\u0165.\u201c Johan o\u010dervenel ako ma\u010farsk\u00e1 paprika.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eA \u010do keby som to nebol ja?\u201c zab\u0155dol do nezn\u00e1meho.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eTak by som povedal, \u017ee som si \u0165a s niek\u00fdm splietol. S b\u00fdval\u00fdm spolu\u017eiakom z kr\u00fa\u017eku, ktor\u00e9ho som desa\u0165 rokov nevidel,\u201c zarehlil sa Rado.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eHm, uverite\u013en\u00e9,\u201c zakabonil sa Johan.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201ePo\u010f, stav\u00edme sa e\u0161te u m\u0148a,\u201c nasmeroval ho Rado.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Na r\u00fdchlovku? Pomyslel si Johan. Bol to prv\u00fd otvoren\u00fd homosexu\u00e1l, s ktor\u00fdm sa na\u017eivo rozpr\u00e1val, t\u00ed predt\u00fdm \u017eili v kobk\u00e1ch utajenia. To \u201eu m\u0148a\u201c zna\u010dilo predaj\u0148u c\u00e9de\u010diek na Vent\u00farskej. Dnes u\u017e neexistuje, vystriedalo sa tam nieko\u013eko klubov.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ke\u010f vkro\u010dili dnu, Johanovi vhupla do u\u0161\u00ed hudba Brucea Springsteena <em>Streets of Philadelphia<\/em>. Potajme \u010d\u00edtal knihu, na ktor\u00fa si u\u0161etril vyberan\u00edm zemiakov na dru\u017estve, mal ju v obale z tril\u00f3gie <em>Gr\u00f3f Monte Christo<\/em>. Asi trikr\u00e1t sa pritom rozrum\u00e1zgal. Tie\u017e t\u00fa\u017eil c\u00edti\u0165 tak\u00fa l\u00e1sku, ako John a Mercedes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Do oka mu padol v\u00fdber pesni\u010diek Tears for Fears. Kedysi si dokola p\u00fa\u0161\u0165al <em>Woman in Chains<\/em> z kaze\u0165\u00e1ku, ktor\u00fd mu na narodky k\u00fapil otec. Jedin\u00fd dar, \u010do od neho prijal. Nen\u00e1videl, ke\u010f sa v jeho my\u0161lienkach za\u010dal objavova\u0165, v jeho psych\u00e9 to znamenalo bl\u00ed\u017eiacu sa katastrofu, hor\u00facu bublaj\u00facu penu, ktor\u00fa sa usiloval udr\u017ea\u0165 v zovret\u00ed ve\u013ekej \u017eeleznej balustr\u00e1dy tak, aby sa z jeho p\u013e\u00fac nevyvalila Etna. Bolo jasn\u00e9, pre\u010do ho matka nechcela, pre\u010do od neho u\u0161la. A pre\u010do Johan nezostal na v\u00fdchovu u neho. Prepil aj posledn\u00e9 zlat\u00e9 retiazky. U opatrovate\u013eky sa objavil presne dvakr\u00e1t, raz doniesol synovi magnetof\u00f3n, ako\u017ee odpustok, a druh\u00fdkr\u00e1t figu borov\u00fa, u\u017e bol nadr\u00fazgan\u00fd. M\u00e1ria ho vy\u0161marila. Ke\u010f ho Johan videl posledn\u00fd raz, pok\u00fasil sa z neho vydolova\u0165 viac podrobnost\u00ed o maminej smrti.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eO akej smrti?\u201c b\u013eabotal stvorite\u013e.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eNerozumiem\u2026\u201c Zm\u00e4tok vtedy strelil Johanovi zaucho.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eTvoja matka zmizla,\u201c dodal otec.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eNezomrela?\u201c nech\u00e1pal Johan.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eNeviem o tom.\u201c A por\u00fa\u010dal sa.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Plav\u00fd \u0161uhaj sa vr\u00e1til zo skladu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eM\u00f4\u017eeme \u00eds\u0165.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eA kam?\u201c p\u00fdtal sa vypla\u0161ene Johan.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eTo je tajn\u00e9. Vie\u0161, revol\u00facia s\u00edce prebehla, ale pre na\u0161ich \u013eud\u00ed opatrnosti nikdy nie je dos\u0165,\u201c poznamenal ticho jeho gej t\u00fator.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">U\u017e len zaviaza\u0165 mi okolo lebky tmavomodr\u00fa \u0161atku, pomyslel si Johan. A\u017e nesk\u00f4r zistil, \u017ee Hanky Code pou\u017e\u00edvali gejovia v 70. rokoch minul\u00e9ho storo\u010dia ako predpo\u010diatok Grindru. Tmavomodr\u00e1 znamenala an\u00e1lny sex, fuchsiov\u00e1 spanking. Z\u00e1rove\u0148 si pripadal ako templ\u00e1r, johanit. Kedysi si vysn\u00edval tajn\u00fd R\u00e1d johanitov, \u010do \u017eil na ostrove a str\u00e1\u017eil ZOO pln\u00e9 nebezpe\u010dn\u00fdch em\u00f3ci\u00ed. Najstra\u0161nej\u0161\u00ed bol obrovsk\u00fd vlk hrivnat\u00fd.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Na zast\u00e1vke narazili na \u010fal\u0161\u00edch \u201ena\u0161incov\u201c, rozumej tepl\u00fdch, homo\u0161ov, pu\u00adpu\u0161ov. Johan si tie ozna\u010denia pam\u00e4tal od z\u00e1kladky.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Vy\u0161\u0161\u00ed sa volal Pali, spod oble\u010denia sa mu vinuli pop\u00ednav\u00e9 k\u00fasky tetovania. Druh\u00fd, men\u0161\u00ed, volali ho Pep\u00edk, sa len hih\u0148al.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201e\u010eal\u0161ia princezn\u00e1,\u201c chichotal sa. Ak Johan h\u013eadal princa na bielom koni, on bol mo\u017eno \u0161\u013eachti\u010dnou. Hodn\u00fa chv\u00ed\u013eu cestovali autobusom, podupk\u00e1vali v kr\u00fa\u017eku ako zohrat\u00e1 partia, Johan ob\u010fale\u010d ako adept, ktor\u00e9ho maj\u00fa iniciova\u0165 do nov\u00e9ho spolku. Vyst\u00fapili a nieko\u013ek\u00fdmi krivolak\u00fdmi uli\u010dkami sa dostali k o\u0161umelej n\u00edzkej budove. Naboku svietil kr\u00ed\u017e a n\u00e1pis Zdru\u017eenie kres\u0165anov a milovn\u00edkov Boha. Johan nasucho preglgol.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Nie je to pasca? Vst\u00fapi dnu, obaria ho sv\u00e4tenou vodou a do dierky mu zatl\u010d\u00fa k\u00f4l. Zastal a nedok\u00e1zal sa pohn\u00fa\u0165. Na podo\u0161v\u00e1ch mal sekundov\u00fdm lepidlom nalepen\u00fa stigmu: prehre\u0161ok.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Jeho opatrovate\u013eka nav\u0161tevovala om\u0161e pravidelne, v Johanovi bl\u00fadili pastier\u00adske listy pln\u00e9 poni\u017eovania.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201ePo\u010f,\u201c prebral ho zo stronza Rado. \u201eNeboj sa, nemaj\u00fa tucha, \u010do vystr\u00e1jame. Myslia si, \u017ee sa lie\u010dime.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eAle\u2026\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eNeboj, na toto liek zaru\u010dene neexistuje, \u017eiadny homocil\u00edn, ako by si sv\u00e4tu\u0161k\u00e1ri \u017eelali.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Vo\u0161li. Tam u\u017e \u010d\u00edhal s poh\u00e1rom lipov\u00e9ho \u010daju a s osvie\u017een\u00edm na per\u00e1ch Ivo. Vraj je r\u00e1d, \u017ee Johan pri\u0161iel. Len \u010do si sadli do kruhu, vst\u00fapil on, ved\u00faci skupiny. S \u00fa\u010desom na sp\u00f4sob hniezda dru\u017en\u00edka vrabcovit\u00e9ho vyzeral ako guru. Volal sa Sve\u0165o a bol psychol\u00f3g. Ako nesk\u00f4r vysvetlil, skupina GAJ-DY sa zrodila na kres\u0165anskej konferencii v roku 1993. Keby kl\u00e9r tu\u0161il, \u010do za diablovu neviestku povil, zrejme by si na tepl\u00fdch \u013eu\u010foch zlos\u0165 to\u013eko nevylieval. Sve\u0165o znel ako mesi\u00e1\u0161, ktor\u00fd uzn\u00e1va filozofiu p\u00f4\u017eitku a v\u00f4bec, pril\u00edhania. T\u00fdm myslel to, \u017ee ak bude niekto v n\u00fadzi, m\u00f4\u017ee si k nemu pri\u013eahn\u00fa\u0165, m\u00e1 vo\u013en\u00fa poste\u013e. Zasmial sa a mrkol na Johana. Flirtoval skoro s ka\u017ed\u00fdm.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Medzi zoznamovan\u00edm sa do miestnosti str\u010dila star\u0161ia pani s nev\u00e1bne odfar\u00adben\u00fdmi \u0161ticami, \u0161trikovan\u00fdm pl\u00e9dom a ve\u013ek\u00fdm dreven\u00fdm kr\u00ed\u017eom na prsiach, ktor\u00fd sa topil v hu\u0148atom svetri. Guru sa ihne\u010f za\u010dal modli\u0165. Ostatn\u00ed sa pridali, ako\u017ee rozj\u00edmali. Johan opakoval po nich. Slov\u00e1 vyriekli ticho, ale zdalo sa mu, \u017ee namiesto klasickej modlitby za\u010dul, ako vravia: \u201eA uve\u010f n\u00e1s do poku\u0161enia a daj n\u00e1m chlapa dnes, ako v \u00fastach, tak aj v zadku, na veky vekov, an\u00e1l.\u201c \u017dena pokyvkala, pre\u017eehnala sa a odi\u0161la.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eTo je na\u0161a Ane\u017eka. Dohliada na n\u00e1s ako pastierka na ove\u010dky,\u201c riekol Sve\u0165o a v\u0161etci sa zazubili. <a>Bolo zjaven\u00e9<\/a>, \u017ee centrum viedla kres\u0165ansk\u00e1 aktivistka Ane\u017eka, ktor\u00e1 pristupovala k homosexualite ako k lie\u010dite\u013enej poruche. Nemala deti, nevydala sa, dlh\u00e9 ve\u010dery tak tr\u00e1vila pleten\u00edm drap\u013eav\u00fdch pul\u00f3vrov pre svojich adoptovan\u00fdch tepl\u00fdch synov a z cel\u00e9ho srdca si priala, aby im raz mohla na svadbe h\u00e1dza\u0165 ry\u017eu. \u0160koda, \u017ee si zvolila tak\u00fd n\u00e1ro\u010dn\u00fd kon\u00ed\u010dek.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Johan s \u0148ou pri\u0161iel do kontaktu aj nesk\u00f4r. Ane\u017eka bola zanieten\u00e1 katol\u00ed\u010dka a e\u0161te zanietenej\u0161ia konverzn\u00e1 terapeutka. S pomocou miestnej arcidiec\u00e9zy zaviedla Linku Valent\u00edn, kde zm\u00e4ten\u00ed utr\u00e1pen\u00ed homosexu\u00e1lne orientovan\u00ed mu\u017ei volali v snahe o pomoc. Jedin\u00e9, \u010do dostali, bola sv\u00e4ten\u00e1 voda na makovici a pach kadidla, ktor\u00fdm sa z&nbsp;nich pok\u00fa\u0161ala vypudi\u0165 Belzebuba, o ktorom bolo zn\u00e1me, \u017ee si bezosty\u0161ne pochutn\u00e1val na mladom chlap\u010denskom materi\u00e1liku. V\u00fdsledkom bolo, \u017ee sa mlad\u00ed mu\u017ei tr\u00e1pili e\u0161te viac ako doteraz a nejeden siahol po f\u013ea\u0161ti\u010dke borovi\u010dky, po no\u017e\u00edku alebo po povraze. Ane\u017eka v\u0161ak verila, \u017ee im p\u00e1nboh d\u00e1 rozhre\u0161enie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Opakovane vystupovala v telev\u00edzii s jedin\u00fdm \u201evylie\u010den\u00fdm\u201c exempl\u00e1rom. Ukazovala ho ako doktor Frankenstein svoje mon\u0161trum a viedla predn\u00e1\u0161ku o tom, ako mo\u017eno c\u00edtenie zmeni\u0165, a ak nie, tak aspo\u0148 zavrie\u0165 do platinov\u00e9ho trezoru, ponori\u0165 ho na dno Tich\u00e9ho oce\u00e1nu, \u010d\u00edseln\u00fa kombin\u00e1ciu prehltn\u00fa\u0165 a zadr\u017eiava\u0165 stolicu. Kto by sa hodlal hraba\u0165 vo vn\u00fatornostiach, pomyslel si vtedy Johan. A ke\u010f Ane\u017eka dostala od svojho zverenca svadobn\u00e9 ozn\u00e1menie, pote\u0161ila sa. Jej rados\u0165 v\u0161ak netrvala dlho. Rozviedol sa a na\u0161iel si jant\u00e1rov\u00e9ho mu\u017ea \u010diernej pleti v Amerike. Viac sa v telke neuk\u00e1zala, \u0161la obraca\u0165 domorodcov do Kambod\u017ee.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">&#8230; vtedy na stretku vn\u00edmal Johan ve\u013ea pestrosti. Ka\u017ed\u00fd v kruhu sa najprv predsta\u00advil. Bebo, Z\u00e1zriv\u00e1. Veleb\u00ed v\u0161etko pekn\u00e9 aj pekn\u00fdch, ve\u010f viete \u010do. Alfi z Kom\u00e1rom. On sa hanbi\u0165, ale r\u00e1d \u010d\u00edta\u0165 b\u00e1sni\u010dky a literat\u00fara. H\u013eada\u0165 l\u00e1sku a \u010d\u00e1ry-m\u00e1ry. Gejza. Z v\u00fdchodu. \u013d\u00fabi spieva\u0165 \u013eudovky a tie\u017e ob\u013eubuje pestr\u00fdch\u2026 vt\u00e1kov\u2026 nie tak\u00fdch, ak\u00fdch si mysl\u00edme, ale papag\u00e1jov. Julo z Pezinka. Jeho, na\u0161\u0165astie, nelie\u010dili. Ob\u010das sa r\u00e1d l\u00ed\u010di a pozrie si telenovelu, pl\u00e1nuje cestova\u0165 na karneval do Ben\u00e1tok. Juraj z Bratislavy. Zbo\u017e\u0148uje trsa\u0165 v \u00c1\u010dku a m\u00e1 r\u00e1d pekn\u00fdch\u2026 tie\u017e vt\u00e1kov, teda t\u00fdch mu\u017esk\u00fdch a hrub\u00fdch, hlavne to.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Sve\u0165o ich upozornil, \u017ee do podrobnost\u00ed netreba zach\u00e1dza\u0165.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ke\u010f pri\u0161iel rad na Johana, zistil, \u017ee mu stoj\u00ed, a prikryl si lono bundou.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eJohan. Z\u00e1zriv\u00e1. R\u00e1d by som zak\u00fasil prav\u00fa l\u00e1sku,\u201c vydal zo seba tenk\u00fdm hl\u00e1skom. Zahih\u0148ali sa. Nech\u00e1pal pre\u010do. Posledn\u00fd pri\u0161iel na rad chlapec v kapucni. Johanovi pripadal povedom\u00fd. Zahuh\u0148al a&nbsp;za\u0161epkal:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eSom\u2026 Mus\u00edm \u00eds\u0165. \u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Johan sa rozochvel. Bol to on. Chalan, s ktor\u00fdm si p\u00edsal a ktor\u00fd mu tvrdil, \u017ee sa vol\u00e1 \u013dubo\u0161. Chalan, ktor\u00e9ho nevzali na \u0161kolu a s ktor\u00fdm sa prech\u00e1dzal po n\u00e1bre\u017e\u00ed Dunaja. Chalan, ktor\u00fd ho najprv v\u00e1bil a potom odpinkol. Jednoducho, poplietol ho od vrchu po spodok.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Sve\u0165o sa zatv\u00e1ril smutne.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201eAj to sa st\u00e1va, on sa nakoniec vr\u00e1ti, v\u0161etci sa vr\u00e1tia. Alebo skysn\u00fa v Apollone.\u201c<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">V Apollone bol Johan prv\u00fdkr\u00e1t po p\u00e1r mesiacoch na vysokej. Do tajov tohto miesta ho zasv\u00e4tila Sve\u0165ova grupka. D\u00fafal, \u017ee sa mu tam podar\u00ed stretn\u00fa\u0165 ext\u00e1zu svojho \u017eivota. Prosto, prostota si z neho urobila \u017eupan, navliekla si ho na seba a v p\u00e1se utiahla na uzol.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">K\u00fdm tam dorazil, trikr\u00e1t pre\u0161iel po Panenskej \u2013 obsk\u00farny n\u00e1zov pre ulicu, kde sa skr\u00fdvaj\u00fa hrie\u0161ni gejovia, povedala by jeho opatrovate\u013eka. Pivnica, g\u00fd\u010dov\u00e9 stoly, v\u00fdstredn\u00e9 kresl\u00e1, v \u010fal\u0161ej \u010dasti bar s napapr\u010den\u00fdm barmanom v obtiahnutom tri\u010dku a s n\u00e1u\u0161nicou v nose. Ak sa mu chlap\u010dek p\u00e1\u010dil, prelial mu nad \u010diaru, ak nie, nap\u013eul mu tam, pri\u010dom krit\u00e9ri\u00e1 neboli jasn\u00e9. Ke\u010f si Johan vyp\u00fdtal kolu, usmial sa, chv\u00ed\u013eu v\u00e1hal, ale namiesto p\u013euvanca mu dolial rum.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Johan sa rad\u0161ej nebr\u00e1nil a predrob\u010dil do tretej \u010dasti, kde hrali \u010deskoslovensk\u00e9 hity Darinky Rolincovej a Heleny Vondr\u00e1\u010dkovej. Priestoru kra\u013eovali diskogu\u013ea a d\u00edd\u017eej, ktor\u00fd mal okolo bedier len p\u00e1sik l\u00e1tky. A na \u0148om f\u013eak od hor\u010dice. V miestnosti bolo dusno a plno, tel\u00e1 sa tla\u010dili na seba, a ak sa im pri\u0161elec ne\u00adp\u00e1\u010dil, odtl\u00e1\u010dali sa.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><a id=\"_msocom_1\"><\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Autor: Andrej Kuruc \/ Foto: Arch\u00edv Andreja Kuruca Text sme prv\u00fd raz publikovali v \u010d\u00edsle Jar 2025. Ke\u010f sa obzer\u00e1m sp\u00e4\u0165 na svoje mlad\u00e9 roky v\u202f90. rokoch, vybavuje sa mi ten zvl\u00e1\u0161tny pocit neistoty, ale aj t\u00fa\u017eby patri\u0165 niekam, kde by som mohol d\u00fdcha\u0165 slobodnej\u0161ie. Prv\u00fd krok bol nesmel\u00fd \u2013 zavola\u0165 na linku d\u00f4very zdru\u017eenia <a href=\"https:\/\/duhovyrok.sk\/qys\/pamatam-sa-na-neistotu-ale-aj-tuzbu-po-slobode\/\" class=\"more-link\">&#8230;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":4817,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[261,257,259],"tags":[458,266,92,153,619],"class_list":["post-4768","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-komentare-a-analyzy","category-literatura","category-rozhovory","tag-andrej-kuruc","tag-from-qys","tag-kniha","tag-queer-kniha","tag-strateni-v-nahravkach"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/duhovyrok.sk\/qys\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4768","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/duhovyrok.sk\/qys\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/duhovyrok.sk\/qys\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/duhovyrok.sk\/qys\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/duhovyrok.sk\/qys\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4768"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/duhovyrok.sk\/qys\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4768\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4828,"href":"https:\/\/duhovyrok.sk\/qys\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4768\/revisions\/4828"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/duhovyrok.sk\/qys\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/4817"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/duhovyrok.sk\/qys\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4768"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/duhovyrok.sk\/qys\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4768"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/duhovyrok.sk\/qys\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4768"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}